Showing posts with label dont. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dont. Show all posts

29 April 2009

Don't think too too hard...

Somehow, today has been an interesting day of zen, and discovery. Even though it has been one of the simpler days, when compared to the hectic sleepless weekends filled with obnoxiousness, loud music, while the stress of trying to become one's-self usually fills out the rest of the week... All day, whil I have been sitting here at my computer slowly crawling across the internet, refreshing the various myspace, facebook, and the like, I have been thinking about something that someone said to me today... Here is a transcript of the convo via AIM.

V: blah blah blah Why do you hate Dylan?


Me: blah blah blah He tries to hard to please people and changes interest

based on the people he is trying to please.

V: Naw, he is awesome, and completely comfortable in his own skin. You are jealous as you should
be.


None of that is direct quotes except the last sentence. Anyway, I digress... The point is that trying to be 'comfortable' in one's 'own skin', as some might say, is probably one of the more difficult tasks of living for me. Day in and day out I measure myself against the people around me. Their oohs and ahs, hems and haws(thanks Logan) can be a carnival-mirror reflection(cliche...I know), if not completely then at least to some minor degree, of who I might be. So, as I sit here clicking the stumble button over and over and listening to the setting sun and the groaning cicadas, I think back to all those people that I 'ruined' or 'wronged'. Does that make me careless? Evil? Does that make them weak? Does it make them broken? Or are we just Narcissus, in love with our reflections in a pool?



GOD that sucked.